Every morning (almost) I head to the gym to start my day. I’m also constantly riding the subway and observing those around me. When I got out at night to clubs or music venues I am seeing them. By them, I am talking about the terribly dressed, bad facial hair, poorly groomed straight guy.
I feel so bad for straight women with the options they are presented with. Do straight men not own mirrors? So many times I’ll be out and women will want to talk to me, and just outright flirt with me, but I’m not interested. I mean, I enjoy talking, but I’m gay and live with my boyfriend.
So why does this happen to me and not to you? Well, I’m here to tell you that it is not as mysterious as you may think. Here’s a list of a few things you should honestly assess about yourself if you’re a straight guy having trouble meeting women.
- Facial Hair – Okay, so this is probably the #1 issue with straight men today. 99% of all facial hair looks horrible. If you’re going to have facial hair, do it right. Some styles you should NEVER do. Never have a soul patch under any circumstance. NEVER have a chin-only beard where you shave the mustache. NEVER have a chin strap beard, and most important, NEVER A NECK BEARD. The safest bet is to just stay clean-shaven. If you insist on having facial hair, keep it NORMAL, TRIMMED, AND GROOMED EVERY DAY!
- Wear clean clothes that fit – STOP WEARING HUGE PANTS, It looks really really bad. Are your ankles like a dinger inside a bell? This is a bad sign. Wear your size, NEVER let the heals of your shoes walk on the back of your pants. This is so f-ing disgusting. Wear your pants on your waist, not below your ass (this one should be obvious). Stop wearing OLD DIRTY SHOES. This one is insane to me. So many straight guys wear disgusting old shoes. Throw that shit away. You’d be better off with a clean new pair of Keds, then a gross dirty ass pair of Air Jordans. Guess what, girls don’t give a rats-ass about Basketball shoes. If anything it shows them you make bad choices as to where you spend your money, and if they’re old and dirty, it’s even worse. Wear shirts that fit. Once you get all of the above, then you can actually start color coordinating. Never wear cargo shorts, or hats with stickers on them. Stay away from sports team wear in general.
- Hair – get haircuts, shave your damn neck hair, buy a damn blow-drier. You might be saying, I do style my hair. But how do you style it? Are you using wet looking moose or gel? Don’t do that. Does your hair look like Frankenstein? This may be a Brooklyn only thing, where some guys are shaving a straight line on their foreheads (think Drake). This looks really really bad. Do not do this. If you’re taking the time to style yourself, do it right.
- Wash your clothes. Seriously, this matters.
- Do not wear cologne, or body sprays, but DO wear deodorant and or essential oils.
- Instead of talking about yourself, ask questions. Conversations go two ways. The more you want to know about who you’re talking to, the more they’ll want to know you.
You could be overweight, not especially attractive, but if you do all of the above you will stand out from the crowd and women will start paying attention to you. Don’t be afraid to ‘look gay’. Believe me, it’s a far better stereotype than the ‘straight look’.
Bad facial hair: